What’s one thing people who go to the gym have in common with people who don’t? They all like to make gym jokes. So this list of funny gym quotes should prove effective for just about anyone!
Whether you’re a gym rat or a couch potato, you’ll find a hilarious gym joke to relate to here. As someone who’s belonged to both of these categories during my lifetime, I found myself snorting with laughter several times as I was looking for these quotes. In the end, we’re left with plenty of iconic lines you’ll be able to use in your day-to-day life!
I’ve found quotes you can use as gym selfie captions and jokes you can share with gym buddies. There are even some lines you might utilize to direct your lazy friends to the nearest gym gently. And even if you hate going to the gym, you’ll find some precious gems here!
48 Funny Gym Quotes to Get You Going!
Gut-Busting Funny Gym Quotes for Gym Rats
#1. “I want someone to look at me the way I look at weights.”
#2. “A list of reasons why you should go to the gym: gains.”
#3. “At this point, my blood type is probably whey.”
#4. “Problems in your life are like the weights in the gym. You can either get weighed down by them or turn them to your advantage and become stronger.” ― Toffee
#5. “Most of the men and women at the gym are working towards the same goal.
The perfect female body.” ― Nitya Prakash
#6. “Society is better off with me in a gym.” ― K.A. Tucker
#7. “You know you’re a gym addict when you’re single AF but you’d rather go to the gym than go on a date.”
#8. “I will never break up with my gym. We just seem to work out.”
#9. “I’m in a good place right now… not emotionally, I’m just at the gym.”
#10. “I must go. My gym needs me.”
#11. “In training, you listen to your body. In competition, you tell your body to shut up.” — Rich Froning Jr.
#12. “You know you’re a gym addict when it’s rest day, and you’re counting the hours until it’s time to work out again.”
#13. “When you wake up on rest day and wonder how you’re going to survive.”
Instagram-Worthy Funny Gym Quotes to Use as Workout Selfie Captions
#14. “Body type: Works out but definitely likes donuts.”
#15. “If you have time for social media, then you have time for exercise.”
#16. “I’ve got 99 problems, but I’m going to the gym and ignoring all of them.”
#17. “I go to the gym because clearly, my amazing personality deserves an awesome body to go with it.”
#18. “What’s the best way to build upper arm strength? Take lots of selfies!”
#19. “I don’t always go to the gym. But when I do, I make sure everyone on Facebook knows about it.”
#20. “If you still look cute after the gym, you didn’t work out hard enough.”
#21. “The best highlighter is sweat.”
#22. “I ate healthily and exercised today. I better wake up skinny tomorrow.”
#23. “Hakuna Masquata — it means nice booty for the rest of your days.”
Good-Natured Funny Gym Quotes to Tease Your Lazy Buddies With
#24. “Some people who have been working out regularly for months or even years are still out of shape because the number of cheat days they have in a week exceeds six.” ― Mokokoma Mokhonoana
#25. “To lose weight, spend time at the gym. To appear like you’ve lost weight, spend time with people who are bigger than you.” ― Mokokoma Mokhonoana
#26. “Join the most expensive gym. Then you won’t have money for food and will lose weight.” ― Nitya Prakash
#27. “You know it’s time to start a fitness regimen when you have nothing too loose.” ― Nitya Prakash
#28. “Excuses don’t kill the fat, exercises do.” ― Amit Kalantri
#29. “Are you fat and ugly? Join our gym and just be ugly!”
#30. “What type of exercise do lazy people do? Diddly squats.”
#31. “If your dog is fat, you’re not getting enough exercise.”
#32. “Take the admission to the gym to avoid admission to the hospital.” ― Amit Kalantri
#33. “I am quite an inspiration to everyone at my gym. They realize in dread that if they don’t do proper workouts and diet, this is how they would become.” ― Nitya Prakash
#34. “I try not to bring my phone to the gym — it’s too tempting to play with it.” — Andrew Yang
#35. “‘Divided we stand,’ Simon thought, his stubborn biceps refusing to bulge. ‘United we do push-ups.’” ― Cassandra Clare
#36. “You want to lose weight, and weight doesn’t want to lose you… Relationships are so complicated.” ― Nitya Prakash
Relatable Funny Gym Quotes for People Who Hate Working Out
#37. “At the gym, I’m like a ninja. You’ll never see me there.”
#38. “Does refusing to go to the gym count as resistance training?”
#39. “I can’t believe I forgot to go to the gym today. That’s like 7 years in a row now.”
#40. “Today, I laughed until my abs started hurting, so I can skip the gym.”
#41. “Oh, I just wasted two hundred dollars on a gym membership, which I didn’t use…even once. My shorts are getting shorter. Lately, I’ve been looking like a slut — unintentionally of course.” ― Danielle Esplin
#42. “Instead of calling it the John, I’m going to start calling my bathroom the Jim. That way, I can say I go to the gym every morning.”
#43. “Gym should be illegal. It’s humiliating.” ― Laurie Halse Anderson
#44. “I believe that every human has a finite amount of heartbeats. I don’t intend to waste any of mine running around doing exercises.” — Neil Armstrong
#45. “If I were to draw on a paper what gym does for me, I would make one dot and then I would erase it.” ― Elizabeth Berg
#46. “I don’t get why people pay to exercise in a gym when it’s free to not exercise.” — Bridger Winegar
#47. “When I feel like exercising, I just lie down until the feeling goes away.” — Robert M. Hutchins
#48. “I have to exercise in the morning before my brain figures out what I’m doing.”
Every day you go to the gym is a victory in my book — so why not share it with the world? These silly lines will definitely go well with your gym buddies and your social media followers. After all, no one likes people who are too serious about exercise! So show some good humor!
Of course, you’ll also be able to use some of these lines if you’re not a regular at your local gym. Ultimately, why would you feel guilty about not going to the gym when you can have some fun with it instead? Share your dilemma by posting a pic and captioning it with one of these funny gym quotes!